U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize