I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
