It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
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