So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize