I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
