my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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