Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
