So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
