Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
