I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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