You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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