Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize