How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Randomize
