That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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