then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
