Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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