Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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