Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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