i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
