She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
