Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Randomize
