Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
