Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
