"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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