I'm so fucking centered right now
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
false alarm. still invincible.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
