Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Randomize