remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Is it penis luge time yet?
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
