I need help removing her.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize