you guys were way drunker than both of me
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Randomize
