dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
