i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
