Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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