I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
