I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
