I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
