Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I think I have vodka in my lungs
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize
