Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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