beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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