The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize