is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
