she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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