So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
