after a month anything with tits is on the radar
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
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