We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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