somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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