Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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