As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
