One girl and one boy is just not enough.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
