We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
