bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
