sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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